NAME: NICOLA
RESOLUTION: STOP BEING A BITCH
Days 1-4: Resorting back to my old bitchy ways. But it isn’t my fault, if I see something I have an opinion on I have to voice it. I also end up bitching about a Wii character. Is that bitching? But still, vast improvement.
Days 5-8: I have been very good. I only lost my cool when my mum told me fashion doesn’t matter when you die from hypothermia. LIVE BY THE SWORD, DIE BY THE SWORD! But I really am doing well.
Days 9-12: Hit a snag – insulted various staff members in a Heslington shop. But the girl was “special” and the boy looked like a one man Goldie Lookin chain tribute act. Ooopsie. Must fight the bitchiness!
Success? Some people are petty, some people are from Leicester and some people write for Nouse – we all have our flaws! Maybe being a bitch is simply mine? But I swear I have improved.
NAME: JACK
RESOLUTION: GET FIT
Days 1-4: Feeling hungover and then lazy for first few days. I decide to solve this problem by laying in bed, getting back to York, procrastinating, eating many biscuits and ordering Viking’s – well done me!
Days 5-8: I start! Diet involves 1 main meal and 6 snacks a day and protein shakes. Fitness is weight lifting (which just feels like a way to emasculate me in front of other gym users) and jogging…slowly.
Days 9-12: GIVEN UP – bored and wanted cheese. All I have learned is that protein shakes are made for people without taste buds, gyms are dull, gym users are dull people and I bloomin’ love food.
Success? None Whatsoever!
NAME: AMY
RESOLTUION: DIET
Days 1-4: In Greece and wake up in place-I-can’t-remember-adopolis with a hangover. Spend the next few days travelling to mountain climbing destinations. I learn that the hangover is a gift that keeps on giving!
Days 5-8: Still in Greece, mainly because of snowy Gatwick. My diet consists mainly of feta – i.e. a food designed around the premise of 3 parts salt and 1 part cheese. Think I might need more structure.
Days 9-12: Finally flew back, but had a stomach bug so the first thing I ate for 24 hours was a rotten aeroplane sandwich. Suppose that sort of constitutes a diet. When I get back to York I will have sturcture.
Success? I have to admit that I haven’t been incredibly successful so far. But don’t blame me, blame hangovers, Greek food, viruses and aeroplane food. When I get back to uni I will succeed though, I promise.
NAME: SCOTT
RESOLUTION: KEEP A DIARY
Days 1-4: I am going to write a diary. EVERY DAY. I forget so much stuff. Our youth is important. This is it. My youth in print. I had some chips today. And the weather is nippy.
Days 5-8: Why is it called a Pelican Crossing?
Days 9-12:…
Success? Mixed!
NAME: ANON
RESOLTUION: STOP SLEEPING WITH MY EX
Days 1-4: I am utterly failing to fulfill my resolution. Twice already! What the hell is wrong with me? Now I am chatting to him online and he complains about being single. Seriously…seriously!
Days 5-8: Still failing. He keeps texting me and I reply. He keeps propositioning me and I…well…you can guess. I have even agreed to keep meeting up with him while back at uni together. Am I just a bad person?
Days 9-12: I MADE SOME PROGRESS! However, this is mainly because I told him nibbling my ear slightly for 30 seconds did not constitute acceptable foreplay. He hasn’t contacted me since then.
Success? No sex with ex for 4 days now. I think that counts as a wonderful achievement that shall be celebrated in years to come. Think of the Bayeux Tapestry with sex, groping and a row about ear nibbling!