Centurions’ Shit Lad

Photo: Ruth Gibson

by Adam Coe

Embarrassment plagued the Ultimate Lad event held in Derwent when an over-excited contestant uprooted a tree planted in memory of the College’s former provost, Ron Weir.

The Economics and Social History Lecturer had been Derwent College’s provost for 20 years when he died in 2009.

The contestant was representing the University’s American Football Squad, the York Centurions, as part of the ‘BanterLad’ episode of the competition.

Sam Asfahani, York Sport president and England international American Football star, told Vision he had strong words for both the perpetrator and the organisers: “York Sport is investigating the matter and an appropriate punishment will be delivered once all the details are known.

“The act in itself was appalling and cannot be left unpunished. Furthermore, I worry greatly when events such as Ultimate Lad are held, and contestants are encouraged to drink lots, and then steal items on campus. This was always a recipe for disaster,” he said.

The vandalism occurred during a round summarised by another contestant as “Steal Something for Banter.” One of the contestants entered the Ron Weir memorial garden, which contains small fruit trees in a plot near the porters’ lodge. Having taken one, the contestant then proceeded to bring it back to the dining area of Derwent College, where the event was being held.

Many of the 100-strong crowd realised the horrific significance of the ‘Lad’s’ actions. However, he was allegedly unaware of the tree’s symbolic meaning.
Alastair Carroll, a spectator and first-year English and History student at Derwent criticised the organisers: “What could they expect? If they pump him full of booze and tell him he’s a lad, obviously he’ll do something stupid.”

Derwent’s Vice-Chairs provided a joint-statement shedding light on the fall-out: “Ultimate Lad was a student-run event which aimed to raise as much money for charity as possible. To clarify, the task in question was not to steal an object, but to get a humorous object from campus.

“This challenge has been run for numerous years as a bar quiz and Freshers’ Week event challenge, with no issues of this kind to date. Competitors were told explicitly in the challenge description that they should not do anything illegal, nor should they do any damage in the acquisition of the object, as this would constitute vandalism.”

They then slammed the conduct of the contestant, “It is deeply regrettable that one individual chose to ignore these rules, choosing to take an object from an area that is so special to many, and as a result we immediately disqualified the individual’s entire team from the competition.”

The Vice-Chairs also offered an apology “on behalf of the individual in question” and told Vision that Ultimate Lad had been struck off the list of Derwent-held events.

16 thoughts on “Centurions’ Shit Lad

  1. Ultimate Lad event? Sounds like a bunch of “lads” (wow, they’re cool!) that shouldn’t have been let into any university.

  2. Love how YUSU condemn this, yet they were obviously happy to let it happen and did nothing to stop it. Hindsight is a beautiful thing.

  3. I find it quite ironic that the YUSU representative who spoke out against the event organisers is both a member of the York American Football Team (obviously, though, he spoke out against the individual and that is commendable), and an avid participant of the notorious ‘Langwith Punch’- which last year got banned when it was found that the older college members were coercing younger members to drink to such excess that one was found passed out in a toilet before they had even left for town. Double Standards, YUSU?

  4. I was in Flares on Sunday and six “LADS” were in a huddle together on the dance floor all with their jeans hanging from their ankles and some had their pants down as well. I suspect they were “LADS” from York Uni. More like a bunch of x private school bunch of homo’s if you ask me and not true LADS!

  5. “The act in itself was appalling and cannot be left unpunished”

    No, it’s not. Child abuse is appalling. Genocide is appalling. These guys dug up a TREE – which was discovered (in hindsight) to have represented an ex-provost. It’s not as if they dug up the body and they probably wouldn’t have dug up the tree had they known its significance.

    Please have a sense of proportion.

  6. @Apathetic

    You can’t just go round digging up trees as and when banter requires it. I’d also suggest genocide is a bit worse than ‘appalling’.

  7. @Contradiction
    Surely that’s a standard night out for most freshers?

  8. @Anon

    What is the point of going to Private School and paying x amount when you can get a free education and come out with the exact or in some cases better GCSE / A Levels. Socialise with people from all walks of life and backgrounds and come out a level headed person. Rather than being modelled into an arrogant, self-centered, obnoxious person that sadly the majority of private school people I’ve met appear to be.

    For your information my mum and dad could of afforded for me to go to Private School. So don’t play the your only jealous as your poor card with me thanks. You just some up my ideology of a private school person and I only read a sentence of your lame insult. I’m sure their are some lovely private school educated people but the majority I’ve met are simply not.

  9. *could have
    *you’re only
    *you’re poor
    *there are

    If you’re going to make ignorant and innacurate sweeping generalisations about the standard of state-funded schooling in comparison to private schooling, at least do it with some semblence of grammatical competence. The entire first paragraph of your diatribe lacks appropriate grammar and sentence structure. In writing that rubbish you’re letting down the argument you’re trying to bolster – that state education is adequate.

    The choice between private/state education is a personal one, and has a massive number of factors. It should be based on the individual child, and their needs, rather than your poorly formed political views, and the rather massive chip on your shoulder. It’s great that you had a good experience of state schooling, but what about the people for whom local schools were rated “terrible” by Ofcom? That’s “the point” of paying for alternative education.

    I adored my private school, and am endlessly grateful for my parents choosing to enroll me there. It taught me everything I know – including basic grammar and spelling.

  10. @ben

    Seriously Ben I was just joking, I would of loved to of attended a state comprehensive and mixed with people from all parts of society……. but whenever I looked round I could never find an adequate place to park my ferrari.

  11. @Anon

    Parking isn’t difficult obviously Daddy’s cheque’s of £24000 plus didn’t pay for common sense

    Daddy should of invested in driving lessons rather than paying the assessor to just pass you.

  12. I think you all mean could have not could of
    also I think you mean sum not some

  13. Ben your Daddy should of invested in some condoms the night you were conceived as you sound like a cunt.

  14. @Anon

    That’s not very nice. Banter to the extreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeme.

    @Private School Bitch & Grammar spelling Nazi’s

    Some valid Points.

    As for the grammar and spelling mistakes I’m Dyslexic so I’ve heard it all before but good job I’ve got broad shoulders. I do agree my grammar is diabolical. However I seem to have more thumbs up than down so people generally agree with my “Rubbish” argument. POWER TO THE PEOOOOOOOOOOPLE!!!

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